'Humour' at RIN.RU - enormous amount of various jokes, comic verses, stories, pictures, photos subscription send a joke or your story send a picture Russian information Network Russian version
 
Surprise!
 
Jokes
computer
drinking
love, sex, marriage
kids
work
lawyers
miscellaneous
 
Long jokes
 
Russian humour
politics
drinking
family life
"new russians (NR)"
miscellaneous
 
Kids' quotes
 
School quotes
 
Simpsons' quotes
 
Funny Zodiac
 
Celebrity jokes
 
Bumper stickers
 
Pickup lines
 
Funny poetry
 
Funny tests
 
Murphy's Law
commerce
computer and tech
love
miscellaneous
 
Strange Laws
commerce
food and drink
sex, marriage
animals
miscellaneous
 
Christmas Humor
short jokes
long jokes
songs and verses
 
Funny stories
 
Your stories
 
Humorous literature
 
funny pictures
celebrity pics
funny photos
adult pictures
      
Funny Zodiac
Sort by: date : rating

sent by: Cop
    Christmas Zodiac
    
    ARIES
    They just LOVE all these little moving things - these little RED things - all these NEW things! And of course all the SHARP things! But they also get TIRED of ALL things quickly - so it`s best to give them many DIFFERENT things, Santa Love!
    
    TAURUS
     They love "stuff" - period! Of course they really like it when it is expensive - when it is VERY pretty - and when they can show it off to their friends. The thing is - you should keep YOUR hands OFF of "their stuff" for your own safety! (So sayeth Santa Sweetie!)
    
    GEMINI
    Geminis are so CURIOUS that they have to stay occupied. They like to look and touch and wonder - so be sure to give them many, many things - the more the merrier. it need not be expensive - just be sure there are MANY of them! Got it Santa, Dear?
    
    CANCER
    Cancers love to "feel" things so obviously they love to have things that bring out their feelings - Teddy Bears and dolls and things that are "loving". They also like to feed their faces - so put some food in that stocking, Santa Baby!
    
    LEO
    Well, actually, Leos think they ARE Santa Claus (or should be) so it`s hard to get them things. Of course, it would be nice to let them drive the sleigh, and make the toy decisions and things like that - in short, PUT THEM IN CHARGE OF THIS THING, Santa!
    
    VIRGO
    Obviously, they have a LONG list of things they want in their stockings - nice, practical things - things they can DO things with. Give them a gadget to help them organize - or some nice healthy PURE food. The list is ENDLESS!
    
    LIBRA
    Now Santa Love, you know that what they REALLY want won`t fit in that stupid stocking! (Well, maybe some parts would!) It would be BEST if you could just find a HUMAN STOCKING and tack it to the mantle. In lieu of that, Santa Sweets, anything expensive would do just fine!
    
    SCORPIO
    SANTA!!!! In front of the children???? I`m SURPRISED at you! You just can`t go around GIVING these Scorpios what they really want - there are LAWS about these things! Well - try giving them some money - they like that! How about some POWER Santa? Got any extra on hand?
    
    SAGITTARIUS
    Now you know good and well what these guys want - they want to ride all over Hell`s half acre with YOU AND RUDOLPH! Besides, how can you fill their stockings? They`re never there - how can you find them? (What do you mean you have your ways? I don`t think I like your attitude, Santa!)
    
    CAPRICORN
    Oh yea! Go ahead! Play favorites now! We all KNOW that YOU are a Capricorn and that you favor the Cappies! In the future we will KNOW when these guys get more loot than the rest of us! What makes you think they work any harder than us? What makes you think they deserve more? Hey! Gimme that....
    
    AQUARIUS
    Santa, I have seen lots of strange stuff in my life, but this thing is the STRANGEST! What would you do with it? (You mean Aquarians know what to do with this? Hmmmm) But what about the little Kidlet Aquarians? Hmmmmm, them too huh? Well, I guess you know best, Old Guy, but this DOES seem a little cruel to me....
    
    PISCES
    Now Santa, just because they say they will sacrifice themselves for others and "don`t want a thing", I think you better regroup. You can`t let these poor sweet souls wake up to an EMPTY STOCKING because you gave their loot to someone else! Whadda ya mean they wouldn`t mind? I think they WOULD mind.....
753 rating: 55  *  to discuss in forum  to discuss in chat


Check what you like mostly (may be several) and press "vote" button.
On page: 


Do you like Russian sense of humour? If so, go on in your study! Find out everything about Russia and its people using the best source of knowledge - RUSSIA THE GREAT project!
Copyright © RIN 2001-
* Feedback